The Day I Spoke my Truth

On this day 12 years ago the day started like any other day. I woke up, did my choirs and went to school. It was my last year in high school. That day after school there was a basketball game that my little brother was suppose to play in and my parents had told me that I could go watch. After school ended my friends and I went to the gym and there we found out that my brother wasn't going to be playing. My parents told me that I had to come home (my parents were very controlling). I was kind of mad cause I wanted to hang out with my friends so I had a little attitude. As we were driving home I was being yelled at the whole way home because of my attitude and being disappointed. By the time we had got home I was so upset from being yelled out. One of my friends called to see where I had gone, because she hadn't seen me leave. I told her that I had to go home and she could tell I was upset. After talking, well mostly crying, for a while I told her that I had a big secret that could really change my life that I needed to tell her. Without even telling her what it is she precedes to tell me that she had thought abuse had been happening. We talk about what was best to do and she told me to tell someone that I trusted. Of course being only 17 I thought that person would be my mother. I had tried to tell my mom what had been happening before by writing a letter but my step dad found it first and that didn't go well. I get up the courage to go ask my mom if we could go for a drive so that I could talk to her. At first she gets mad and tells me just to talk to her there, after insisting that we left for me to tell her (my step dad was in the house) she agreed. As we get into the truck I was shaking not sure how to say what I had to say. After driving just down the street I know that I just need to tell her because the anticipation is about to make me throw up. Are conversation goes as followed:

K: I have something that I need to tell you.

M: What?

K: Dad....... has been sexually..... abusing me since I was about 8.

M: There is no way, why would you even say that?

She turns the truck around and drives us home. The tears start to pour down my face, not just out of sadness but because I was hurt. My step dad was right no one would believe me when I told. I thought that my mom was supposed to keep my safe no matter. I guess I was wrong that isn't what she thought she needed to do. Instead she drove me right back home to be face to face with the person who had cause years of abuse. As soon as I got home I ran right back to my room, crushed not sure what I was suppose to do know. Was life just going to go on like it always had or what? Little did I know my world was going to be turned upside down in less then 24 hours.

After sitting there with tears streaming down my face I hear someone coming down the hall, my heart starts to pound. Who was it? Was it my mom coming to tell me she believed me? Was it my step dad coming to hurt me? The door comes open and my mom is standing there.

M: Give me your phone

K: (as I hand her the phone) why?

M: Because you have chosen to make up these things you don't get your phone.

K: really?

M: and I talked to your dad and he said that he never did anything like that.

I have never been so scared in my life. I stayed in my room the rest of the night. I couldn't sleep that night I was so scared he was going to kill me. Every footstep I heard I would say a pray to please let me make it to the next day. I have never had such a long night in my life. Finally as the sun came up at 7 I was able to fall asleep.